Having recently discovered Have One On Me, I’ve been understandably slacking on the search for new gems — it’d be like salivating over a lab grown diamond when you’re sitting on an uncut black opal. Which is a truly apt simile for Audioglyphs.

These ‘randomly generated, infinite audio’ NFTs are a series of bleeping blorps set to a slightly less epilepsy-friendly version of the iTunes visualizer. They are marketed as ‘a glimpse into a future of music where instead of buying the rights to listen to music, listeners can truly own a unique version’ — which would be great and all if this were music, but it’s got all the sonic intrigue of a fucking submarine radar, so, nah, hard pass.

About 3eth ($10k) of these were moved in the last day alone. I’d say I’m disappointed but really I just see the potential. If you’re one of the artists I reviewed in a past column, spending months curating the sounds of the future just to get 20 Soundcloud streams, consider pulling a deep cut out the vault, slapping a gif over it, and minting an NFT. Your only competition currently is Travis Bott — minus the style.